Sometimes it feels like I've given up everything in order to be here -- a steady income, supportive community, special friendships -- but then I have the opportunity to get to know a beautiful "Thai" family that welcomes me with open arms, wide smiles, and incredibly generous hospitality. (I say "Thai" because while they live in Thailand and have for generations, they are ethnically different and slightly culturally different than Thai people)
This last week I was welcomed into P'Witoon's family. We're not just talking about his wife and kids, but his ENTIRE family -- parents, sister, grandmother, etc. P'Witoon and his family belong to the Lahu hilltribe group, live in Chiang Rai province (near WinPaPao village), and try to engage with the people in their village to participate in more sustainable agricultural practices. Most people in his village, and the villages surrounding his, practice mono-culture, slash-and-burn (not swidden) farming. Corn being the primary 'cash crop,' that has sent villagers spiraling into debt. P'Witoon encourages and practices planting a variety of different crops that are first used for the family's own consumption and then excess is sold at market.
I was excited to how P'Witoon has changed the landscape of his farm and participate in their daily life. P'Witoon explained to me that 6 months out of the year they work very hard every day on the farm and for 6 months they relax and have vacation. We're in the 6 months of relaxation, though they still keep very busy getting ready for the 6 months of hard work. As a result, of the 5 days I was with them, they only really worked on the farm 2.5-3 days. The full day of work I was there, the guys worked on creating a water retention pond and the women made pig food.
I was told that I'd help make the pig food. I was stoked because I have helped make pig food before and I was anxious to fine-tune and practice my pig food making/machete skills. Pigs eat almost anything, which is great if you have a variety of things to feed them, like P'Witoon does. A base food for P'Witoon's pigs happens to be the stalk base that supports the banana plant. (Bio-nerd sidenote: banana 'trees' are not actually trees and are instead classified as herbaceous because the trunk is not a woody substance but the base of the leaves-called a sheath-that are tightly packed together. It's also known as a pseudostem) The banana stalk looks somewhat like an onion when sliced, all the leaves layered together. To make pig food, the stalks are somewhat thinly sliced and then chopped up with a machete. P'Witoon cut down 4 large stalks to be chopped into pig food. Again, I was stoked.
I was told to sit in a chair in the shade while P'Dara and P'Naiu got set up and started. I wasn't given a machete to help them. After a few minutes, P'Naiu got up from chopping to take care of some other things around the farm, so I took her place with the machete ... I had an opportunity to contribute and prove myself as an adequate pig food maker! Not 5 minutes later P'Naiu returns and tells me that she will do it. I reluctantly gave up the machete, and moved back over to 'my' chair.
Sure, I was a bit disappointed. I hardly had an opportunity to work all week, and wanted to be able to 'earn my keep,' to show I was thankful for the room I had at their village house and the food they gave me. At the same time, I realized that I was a guest and they were probably trying to be hospitable towards me by not allowing to work and help them out. I could instead sit comfortably in the shade and watch them cut up 4 large stalks. While I did "nothing" other than watch them make pig food, I tried to think about it from the Lahu perspective. If I was P'Dara, I wouldn't necessarily want to make the foreign office-worker do stuff for me in the village because they do so much to support the work in the village ... things I would never dream of being able to do. I would want them to be able to relax in the village, and I wouldn't want them to get hurt while chopping up pig food with a machete. So I did my best to be a good guest. I sat there, I smiled, I ate as much as I could (good food=good hospitality) at every meal (even if the meal consisted of things I don't particularly like, but were decently seasoned like snails, fermented vegetables, pork lung, or all chicken parts including the blood) and let these beautiful people serve me.
I also had the opportunity to enjoy P'Witoon's hospitality and care after returning to Chiang Mai. The day after I returned, P'Witoon brought a truckload of bananas to sell at a market in Chiang Mai. It is only by the grace of God that we met up at this market. I was thoroughly lost and had my senses assaulted for almost an hour as I walked around, before P'Witoon spotted me on their way out. I now know exactly where to find them next time. P'Witoon and his wife took me and paid for a late lunch, they wouldn't let me help pay. They were then quite concerned because Jonathan was going to pick me up in about 15 minutes, it was hot out, and there wasn't either a nice place for me to wait or anything for me to do while I waited. According to P'Witoon, I shouldn't be left alone to wait for 15 minutes. Forget the fact I had just wandered around a market by myself for about an hour, that I'm a 23-year-old living in Chiang Mai, that I'm 'friends' with a homeless man near church, and that I almost always carry a sharp Buck knife on my person. Between Jonathan and I, we were able to convince P'Witoon that I would be fine and it wouldn't be a problem for me at all ... though he did walk me to the nearest 7-Eleven where I could wait a few minutes in the air-conditioning.
I feel incredibly blessed to be so fully welcomed and cared for by P'Witoon and his family. Yes, I like my independence and being able to take care of myself, but getting special attention and care (even if it feels excessive or not needed) makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ... that the sacrifices I've made to be here are recognized and greatly appreciated. It still feels hard when I'm craving Easter candy, but I know the people I'm serving value my work and want to care for me in return. And so, I'll continue to try to be content doing "nothing" while experiencing Thai hospitality.
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